Due to the upcoming holidays,things could not be more disorganized. Along with putting up decorations, and buying family and friends Christmas presents and watching my parents do all of that, I am a busy girl. Despite my beliefs on celebrating one holiday at a time, I could not help but think of what this year’s New Year will consist of. Personally, my secret hopes are that the new year will consist of me babysitting the president’s daughters and singing a duet with Adele. Meanwhile. others have more realistic hopes.
So then comes the special time. The time when people from all over close their eyes at 11:59:59 PM to cast their New Year resolutions to the imaginary magical scribes who write down every dream, wish, and hope. No matter how crazy, delusional or horrific the resolution is, by all means these scribes will hold you to it and tell Santa if you do not follow through.
Then there are people like me. The people who refer to themselves as “The Resolution Police.” Our job is to remember family and friends resolutions and call them out when they go against what they said. We then chastise them for inability to keep their promises and make sure that the magical scribes never write down their resolutions ever again.
Our job is going to be every difficult this year. This year especially, very few people will keep their new years resolution. As “The Resolution Police” we advise these people to not even bother making a resolutions at all. We predict that by the time December of 2012 comes around, they will not even remember what their resolution was. That obviously poses a problem and causes us to worry.
So, as chief of “The Resolution Police” I have a special message on behalf of my colleagues, including the magical scribes:
•This year especially, please make more substantial new year resolutions that will cause an impact. Just think, if at least one person in an household decided that they were going to do more random acts of kindness for their New Year’s Resolution, we may be able to accomplish something big: like finding the cure for cancer or even solving world hunger. It’s important that we all try to improve ourselves for the common good but at the same time make promises to ourselves that we are willing to keep.
•If you expect both us and the magical scribes to take you seriously and see a vast improvement from last year’s resolution, then make sure that you are going to try your best and be willing to make the necessary sacrifices in order to accomplish your goal.
•Your resolutions should be more than promising yourself to not drink soda or that you will monitor Jennifer Lopez’s post-divorce on American Idol, or even provide concrete evidence that Pluto is indeed a planet. Those are the stupid promises we make to ourselves that we end up not keeping due to laziness and impossibilities. Think realistically and pick a resolution that you are willing to stick with.
•Have a safe New Year. There isn’t anything we cannot stand more then people who make resolutions when midnight rolls around, but break the resolution by 12:30 AM. Don’t do something that you may regret or that jeopardizes your chance of making your New Year’s Resolution a reality.
In conclusion, make sure that you make this year a special one to remember. There are so many things to look forward to and so many possibilities. There is no telling where or how you will be by the time the next New Year comes around.
You need not worry, because the Resolution Police will always be watching…
Happy Holidays!
To generate your New Year’s Resolution: http://www.moninavelarde.com/newyears/
